I wasn't aware of how much trouble one can get into in one day, before me and my girlfriend visted Amsterdam...but, oh, how quickly we learned. Please note, that I am not endorsing drug abuse if you are a minor...I am simply documenting what happened & what we partaked in while there. This is for mature audiences only, and I will be updating the photo log of the trip day by day. The task was too daunting to try and throw up the entire trip in one afternoon...this will take 11 days for Nasdaq to show you everything he and his special lady experienced while there. Enjoy!
a grueling 7 hour flight upon Continental Airlines started us off on what was to be the greatest vacation I ever took. On the flight, I watched Hero & endless episodes of CSI...turns out I like the show now. I've never been into television dramas before, so that's a first. [Off topic] These days, I'm getting into watching "24" with my girlfriend...
They had video games for you to play in the head console, as well as DJ mixes to listen to to try and break up the monotony of 7 hours of engine noise. This was where I first heard the dance song "Call on Me" by Eric Prydz. The song features a Steve Winwood sample, looped into endless repetition. Call me cheesy, but when the 4/4 oontz thumpage cranks in, it's apparent why it was the rolling song of the summer in the UK.
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OK, so we land at Schipol Airport...due to exhaustion from jet lag, we can't figure out shit...can't figure out how to get train tickets, because the stupid machine wouldn't take our Chipcard...all the instructions were in Dutch. To top it off, both me and my girlfriend are headstrong individuals. Smother that with a little crankiness from not having slept and you have yourselves a fullout Ignorefest. By the time we got on the train to Amsterdam, we weren't speaking to one another...just peering out the window, gazing at the graffiti that lined the train tracks, dreading carrying our luggage for another step. Note to the wise: Never carry 50 lbs of luggage with you to a foreign country, or else you'll be hating life. I must be a wimp, because I thought my hands were bleeding by the time I carried the bags from the train to the taxi.
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We check in to the cozy Hotel Gerstekorrel, which is located just steps from the centre of Amsterdam [Dam Square]. They have a lovely crossaint shop downstairs named Rene's. I would recommend this hotel to anyone, simply for convienence & comfort sake. Their beds are lush. The room could be a little bigger, but nonetheless, we are happy to finally be here...
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So, what does any normal American drug tourist do when they drop their bags off in Amsterdam? Make a beeline for the nearest coffeeshop. After a quick exchange of American Express Traveler's cheques at the TGP Post on Singel, we walk past Grey Area...an American owned coffeeshop I had come across on the internet, with amazing bud. But it was 9 AM and they weren't open yet [Fuggin Slackers] ;-)
So, we end up walking along the Singel river, taking in the new sights & sounds, when we stumble upon Amnesia Coffeeshop. Here's their menu, if you care to take a look. Wiet or Hasj
Upon, settling into our first blunt (which was filled with Stella Blue & Amnesia Haze & Ice-O-Later Hash), we met an older American gentleman by the name of Hank. He took our photo, and told us that he never went back to the States after visiting. Oh, how we envy him.
Then my girlfriend lets out a gasp, I ask "What is it?" She exclaims, "Oh my God, I just saw a naked lady!" I turn around and look out the window, only to be greeted by a lady in lingerie, siting in a window, across the street. Hank tells us that this isn't the Red Light District, but simply a neighborhood street that has sprung up on its own. I've been in Amsterdam for less than 1 hour, and already I am more stoned than I have ever been, with scantily clad women peering out windows on virtually every corner, AND ITS ONLY 10 AM!!!!!
...At that moment, I should have realized that I should exercise moderation while here...and that this isn't an ordinary city, but indulging is what we came here for.
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We had no agenda for the day. Just to wander around and explore our surroundings. On Spuistraat, we came across a smartshop called Innerspace. FYI - a smart shop is a legal store where they sell magic mushrooms, herbal ecstasy, mescaline, peyote cactii, etc. The clerk was very helpful in explaining what each strain of mushroom can do to ones' psyche. We chose Philosopher's Stone, because he said that it wouldn't impair our vision too much with hallucinations, but that we would have an uplifting body high, similar to ecstasy. Navigating our way through the maze of winding foreign streets was hard enough to do sober. We didn't want to be completely fuct out of our gourd...plus they were packaged as chocolate truffles...they seemed easier to digest upon first glance.
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Then, nighttime descended upon us rapidly...it was dark by 4 PM
It was 5 PM and we ducked into what was to become our favorite coffeeshop, The Greenhouse Effect on Warmoestraat. Their prices are excellent, the staff are lifesavers (more on that later)...Purple Haze 3,60 € /gram ... c'mon, you can't beat that!
We smoked Super Silver Haze with Super Kif and drank Heineken Pilsners out of huge pint mugs. Heineken is like Budweiser here in the States...virtually every establishment has it on draft, which is like a dream for us. Go figure, I'm Jamaican-American...our national drinks are Guinness & Heineken.
On empty stomachs, we decided to eat the Philosopher's Stone to maximize its effect {how many ways can one say "Stupid American"?). It was absolutely horrendous, as far as taste. Imagine eating mulch, and you are getting close.
We were around the corner from the Red Light District, so we decided to visit Demask on Zeedijk, so that my lady could shop for some rubber outfits. The lady working in the store had the most bugged out eyes ever. We thought she was on DMT or something...turns out she's a fetish model, because we saw her in a magazine. My girl picked out some pieces & asked about any industrial/fetish parties going on. The clerk lady didn't know of any...she explained that she didn't attend them because they were sleazy.
Next on the agenda was to go to the Erotic Museum and wait for the shrooms to kick in...which they did, in the bizarre cartoon sex room pictured below:
The next few hours were a blur,...I think we ended up just wandering around the Red Light District...I think?!?
At one point, I felt like I was living in the 1300's, with all the Old World charm preserved in the Oude Zijde...
You are probably wondering about the prostitution that goes on there. Don't waste your time on such thoughts...most of them are fugly. I would have taken a picture, but I was afraid their mugs would break the camera lens. Fuck Columbine, this is the Trenchcoat Mafia. Dirty old men in longcoats just loitering in front of the windows in large packs is a sight to see, I suppose. The problem with the girls is that they won't smile, but I can understand why...
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Here's where my forethought of moderation comes into play.
On the street, we go to take a picture of a river, but can't seem to find the camera in the messenger bag we were carrying. At this point, we were tripping heavily, and were losing our shit. The streets around the Red Light District became more & more packed with shady guys in search of a cheap thrill...so we decided to duck into The Greenhouse Effect to try and compose ourselves and find the camera.
Since we are in a coffeeshop, naturally, we start smoking. We find the camera and are feeling great. The DJ was spinning drum & bass, all was well.
Then all of a sudden, I began to feel weak...then my stomach felt really nauseous. I thought I was going to vomit, so I made a beeline for the toilet. I found it difficult getting into the bathroom, because I was losing my motor skills. I could barely move my legs & arms.
Once in the bathroom, I began drinking the tap water, in an attempt to flush my system...next thing I know, I hear my girlfriend screaming "Help him, help him!!!" I passed the fuck out, not once or twice but 5 TIMES!!!! . My girlfriend said I fell out of the bathroom, crashed to the ground back first and took down many bar stools with me. I obviously don't remember what happened, but apparently, all of my debauchery had caught up with me. There was a staff person (a young woman with red dreadlocks) who came & saved the day. She gave me sugar water to drink and said I need to eat chocolate & get my blood sugar back up. She said it happened to her 2 weeks ago and that the weed in Amsterdam is waaaay stronger than what I was accustom to back home.
After I found the strength to stand, me and my girlfriend left The Greenhouse Effect and caught a taxi back to the hotel. I was apparently feeling better, because I asked her if we could get a slice of pizza. Poor little heart...imagine being in a foreign country tripping balls and watching your boyfriend almost OD. Her nerves were shot. I thanked her for taking care of me & apologized for going overboard. I was glad that it was me and not her who experienced that...it would have broken my heart & sent me over the edge if it was her.
So, that was the first day in Amsterdam. The picture below was taken when we got back to the hotel: Don't I look happy for a man who's been unconscious?
We stayed in and puffed our little hearts away, watching Dutch MTV (which by the way has no reality shows of pre-teens hooking up, but actual music videos). We watched "Blinded by the lights" by The Streets, and I could relate to it.
I felt fortunate to be alive and in Europe. I learned to take it easy (no more mushrooms from then on) and respect the power of psychedelics. Good Night Amsterdam...tommorrow, we visit Rotterdam :-)
